Khasi Culture

Where women rule ! ... by Simon & Katerina

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India is often perceived as a country where women are second class citizens, living under the shadow of male authority. In Meghalaya in the far Northeast of India, however, there is a tribal group with an ancient matrilineal culture that sweeps aside all Indian stereotypes. They are the Khasi, and they place women at the forefront of society, so much so, that the men are actually fighting for equal rights.

Matriarchal strength... High

• Children take the mother’s surname, and the daughters pass the name onto their children (matrilineal).
• Daughters inherit family property and the responsibility of looking after their parents in old age - sons get nothing.
• After marriage - the husband moves to the wife’s family house, where she is in charge.
• In the case of divorce - the man moves back to his mother’s or sister’s house with nothing, but does not pay alimony for his children.

Threats to the system... Low

• As the youth are being drawn towards Western culture they are becoming increasingly aware of our predominant patrilineal system.m.
• With business and commercialism expanding, a working Khasi man can become more independent and use his money as leverage within the family.
• More recently, male rights groups are using Christianity as an argument for change.

“Under the matrilineal system, women have gained strong minds,” says Armand, a young Khasi man with a metal welding business in Pynursla.

“When I was two years old my father left, so my mother had to look after my sister and me. She has a stronger personality than her new husband, he has a week mind. The advantage of a matrilineal system is that women are allowed to work and look after themselves. They will not become beggars if they divorce, unlike in the rest of India.”

After a few weeks, however, Armand changes his story…

“There are some problems with the matrilineal system…” he begins, speaking more openly.

“I think to myself, a change to the patrilineal system is the next step. Men want to look after their children and have a say as to how they are brought up and how the house is run. To do this well, they need to have legal possession over their children.”

Although Armand is now suddenly against the system, he is still too afraid to speak out in public or join a male-rights group. Such is the strength the matrilineal system has over society.

The hilly state of Meghalaya is sandwiched between Bangladesh and Assam in the Northeast of India. It is home to 3 tribal groups - Khasi, Jantia and Garo. All follow a matrilineal system, but it is the Khasi who seem to have preserved their culture the best.

Tagged 'The abode of clouds', Meghalaya boasts the highest annual rainfall in the world, and like the mist that lingers in the valleys, so the future of this culture is also unclear.

Early Christian missionaries have managed to convert 80% of the Khasis, leaving only 15% practising the old animist beliefs, which is where the matrilineal system originated from.

Meghalaya became its own state on January 21st 1972, allowing the Khasi 'Scheduled Tribe' to create their own laws to try and protect their culture.

In recent years, a few groups have formed to challenge the matrilineal system, inspired by the patriarchal culture of mainland India and the West. They have begun campaigning for equal rights, and even for a complete reversal of the system from women to men.

Mr Keith Pariat, the leader of the Syngkhong Rympei Thymmai Movement' (SRT) complains openly about the situation…

“Khasi men feel they are only breeding bulls, and their responsibilities end with procreation. I, as a father, have no say over my own children."

“At the end of the day, if the woman decides to divorce, the father leaves the house empty handed, no land, no property, therefore they end up drinking, deserting their wives and dying young.”

Extract from an SRT flyer in Shillong.

“Our demands are quite simple,” Mr Pariat dictates:

• To give full authority to the father;
• To change to a patrilineal system (so children will have the father’s name);
• For inheritance to be equally distributed among sons and daughters, with the eldest son responsible for looking after the parents instead of the youngest daughter.”

Izy and Vicky - property kept by women.

“Those organisations fighting for a change, they have already lost, the woman has won,” Izy says almost shouting. “They have even lost their prestige, because lots of men believe they can’t do the work that the women do.”

Izy and Vicky are sisters and live together in the aptly named suburb of Shillong - Happy Valley.

“We are happy like this, Izi and me. We have a son; we look after him together, so what? We are happy without men,” says Vicky, and Izy echoes her in agreement.

An educated Khasi girl trapped in the village by tradition.

“When I was 18, I left for the neighbouring state of Mizoram. I stayed there two years teaching at a primary school. I was so happy,” says Olivia, a beautiful girl with large melancholic eyes.

"But, I had to move back to help my mother run her tea house, because I am the youngest daughter."

Sadly for Olivia, her dream of returning to Misoram is becoming more and more distant. As tradition dictates, the youngest daughter is expected to look after the family house and take care of her aging parents.

This responsibility, however, is much Olivia's choice as it is her mother’s; it demonstrates once again the control the matrilineal system has over the people, even the educated.